Year Two!

Well, obviously I was a no-show on the post I was going to put up on the 17th. It was kind of a bummer of a day. Adam was sick, so we hung around the house, but we all drove to KFC and brought it home to eat. (My kids are huge chicken-eaters.) Other than that, it was ho-hum. No fireworks or bells and whistles... Oh well.

We didn't have as much stuff as last year for our package to Ukraine, but it's still a nice couple of boxes. When I get the final count of the shoes/undies from the box at my dad's house, (we'll get that Saturday when we do a "Cooking Day" over there again.) I'll post the total of how much of what we wound up with. I so want to thank all of you who wanted to help with this project. It really feels good to give, doesn't it?

Going through the undies and shoes for "The Kids," has brought back a lot of orphanage memories for our crew. I wish I had a video camera going the day we packed up the box of the suff we have so far. It was fun to hear, "oh, those kids will love these! Look how nice and white they are! Oh I bet so-and-so will have these!" But I also heard things like, "Mama, there was a sad boy that had to lay in bed with only his undies and no blanket. He rocked back and forth like this. He did that because nobody loved him. I did that too sometimes...."

And that is why we send yearly packages. To ease the distress, even ever so slightly of these sad little souls. I just wish there were something more I could rig up for them. Like parents for all!

Speaking of! Things are starting to flow again in Ukraine, and they have apparently lifted the ban on Americans adopting. September appointments are being handed down right now! I'm so relieved for those "stuck" little kids. Get them OUTTA there!

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Ok, enough of that... Year Two... So many changes...

Adam: Boy has he grown! This child is going to be taller than me Any Second. Not kidding. In a few weeks, he'll be taller than me. Ok, I'm only 5'1 or 2 or so, but he's only 11 years old, and two years ago, he was only up to the middle of my chest!

This summer we have had lots of highs and lows, but he's really a bajillion times more attached to me than he was last year this time. We started school this Monday (another reason for my delayed post!), and he finished all his work before lunch. Unheard of a year ago. He's basically a really great kid. His speech has made enormous progress too, and he is beginning to say his r's correctly. We've worked hard on those, and on his "l's." He has a long way to go, but he can say them, and can correctly say them when we make him repeat himself. It's just harder, and he usually prefers the easy route. ;O) His speech is overall, much, much better than a year ago, and actually, while he still struggles to express himself when he is stressed/excited, he actually is doing GREAT. I took a video of him a month ago or so, and wow, I just couldn't believe how good his grammar, etc. was. I was a proud mama! (AM a proud mama!) ;O) He has a hard time with prepositions though. That's the case with most new language-learners though, so that's nothing alarming. It's occassionally amusing though! For example, after working really hard the other day, he declared, "Mama, I'm all pooped up." After I was done giggling hysterically, I had to explain that English is funny about its prepositions. That little word "up" cannot be interchanged with "out." Especially in this instance.

Adam still struggles with math something Fierce. He does it great one day, and the next day it is Gone. I can remember way back when I was teaching him to count by two's that when he had that down, I had to reteach him how to count by one's. Oy. Frustrating for everyone. However, we have gotten him up to being able to figure out the problems with math blocks pretty consistantly. He can get the problems all right doing them that way (he's got the theory down, in other words), but memorizing just kills him. And, unfortunately, there's just a Ton of memorizing in math. He's getting a double dose of math now. I do it with him in the morning, and John works with him at night. Plus we have a math computer game, a "flashmaster" hand-held math-facts quizzer and a cd with the math facts repeated in song. Paper and pencil just doesn't work for this guy.

He still doesn't like a lot of toys around, and more often than not, if he is given a small toy, he'll give it to his sisters just to be rid of it. Stuff is still stressful to him. He's much better with big stuff; he loves his tent, blankets, bike, stuffed animals, computer games, etc. He just got a remote-control car that he loves. His flashlight is one of his most important toys. He pulled off the mattress from his loft, put it on the floor, put blankets up all around his bed as a curtain, and then set his tent up by his matress. He now has a multi-room fort that he sleeps in. Perfect for a boy his age! But little toys, he can't stand. Well, don't get me wrong. He likes them for the first hour he has them. But, when it's time to be done playing with it, he doesn't want anything to do with it. He wants to get rid of it. Doesn't want it in his room. That's just Adam. He did go on a short lego kick, but after we moved he's kept them put away and doesn't want them out. I have three boxes of "stuff" from our move that I have been keeping in his room, and he hasn't touched them. The Adam that stepped off the plane 2 years ago would have had those boxes ripped open, contents strewn across the floor and boxes shredded by Night Two of them being in his room.

Also, Adam bounces. He doesn't walk. He gallops, skips, bounces, and usually shrieks or squeaks while he's doing so. If I'm sitting on the couch and call him over to sit by me, he'll come hopping over and Crash down so close to me he's usually on half of my leg and has spilled whatever it is I'm holding. Nothing delicate or graceful about that boy! lol!

He's also the King of Impulsiveness. John and I have joked that his hands have minds of their own. It's like his mind is detached from them. I can look him in the eye (as I did last night; this is a true story from yesterday), and say, "Adam, the freezer was left open, you kids need to stay out of the freezer." Then, I left the room, turned around and peeked back in the kitchen. Adam *had* to open the freezer. Basically, if a thought goes through his mind, it comes out his hands. He's been in Tons of hot water over the past few years over that. Hence all the broken things at the Fisher house. Another example... One of his aunts gave him a pen with a little whirling fan on the end of it a few weeks ago. He kept shoving it in peoples' faces thinking it was funny. I have No Idea how many times we told him to stop that, and that people don't like people shoving things in their faces, etc. As soon as John or I walked away, off went the brain, and his hands turned on the fan again and shoved it into the next person's face. We finally took it away. He has very little impulse control... I have to say, it gets old. But ya know what? He's my kid. He's got some strange quirks, and acts many years younger than he is, but he's ours, and he's who was meant to be in our family. He's the most tenderhearted boy you'd ever meet. Loves his sisters and little kids to Pieces. His giggle melts my heart. He has been through so much in his life... yet his sunny personality has protected him from complete destruction. He thinks the best in people, and loves people the way they are. He very seldom talks bad about people. He instantly loves everyone he meets. I wish I were more like that! I know people who ought to wear a sign that says, "Caution, I bite!" because, well, they do! They bite others with their words every chance they get. But Adam isn't like that. He's a much bigger person than a whole lot of people I know.

Uff, this is getting long. And I haven't even blabbered on about Liana and Leks yet! You'll all go blurry-eyed before you finish reading this! (I know I'm already starting to!) ;O)

Liana is going to make a fabulous adult. She thinks she is one already, and this being a little kid stuff really cramps her style quite a bit. ;O) Seriously though, she sure does like to act grown-up! She got some make-up from her cousin for a birthday present, and this girl's countenance has been an odd shade of periwinkle ever since. She even snuck some fuscia lipstick on at church last week. And of course Mama had to notice it in the church parking lot on the way OUT... ;O) She's doing great with her school work, and I'd say she's a run-of-the-mill 8yo in all her subjects. Unbelieveable that this girl didn't know a word of English just two years ago. You'd never know! (Well, except her accent! She enunciates her letters more than "normal." Like she says the word "little" with the "t" sound in there instead of how an average American in this neck of the woods would say it: "liddle.") I guess because she basically learned to read at the same time that she learned to speak, she says things more the way they are written. Not sure on that, but I guess it makes sense. She will occasionally get a word wrong here or there also. Like the other day I caught her calling the palm of her hand her "paw" of her hand. Other than that, she doesn't really have any other "hang-ups" leftoever from "being adopted." She's about as well-adjusted as any other 8yo American girl I've met... but actually, in a lot of ways, she's BETTER adjusted! (That's just her mama's two-cents though!) She's strong, strong, strong willed, but she is very tender-hearted when she is confronted with having done something wrong. She's also super loving and affectionate. It comes easier with her friends than her siblings sometimes, but really, for the most part they all get along famously. She and Aleksa are best friends as well as sisters, but uff, her little sister had better not steal her bubblegum! ;O) Gets along great with me and John... lots of hugs, kisses, snuggles, etc. Like Adam, though, she can't walk across the room. She Must cartwheel. I mean Must. Her "skirt" thing she was going through recently had to be stopped... she didn't care that she had a skirt on when she cartwheeled. The whole family was sick of seeing pink panties. ;O) So, until I can find her some bloomers, or until she outgrows her cartwheel addiction, he's banned from skirts for now. (Which is a bummer for me because I just made about 10 of them for the girls!) And since Leks likes to match her sister... she hasn't been wearing them as much either.

Aleksa. The little stinker has grown up on me this month. She went and had a birthday, which was horrible enough, but within just a few weeks, she also lost her two upper teeth. (One of them just last night!) She is now a Big Girl. *WWWWAAAAAAAHHHH* Mama is not likin' that at all, let me just say. But, anyway, Leks can't say her "s's" now. They're "th's." Thee hath no teeth, tho thee can't thay her th'th right. ;O) I've not been able to resist teasing her a bit, and thankfully her sunny disposition takes it in stride, and she has laughed at herself too, understanding that she'll get her S's back when she gets some new teeth. ;O)

Leks has grown up probably the most this year. She's very much a big girl. Reads, rides her bike, is very social, etc. Her fears have subsided and she's allowed herself to enjoy being a little girl. She doesn't let herself freak out about dogs (a major fear before), or about heights or being upside down. She has really learned to think rationally this year, instead of letting her feelings/fears rule her. Of the three though, she's the biggest people-pleaser. She likes to make everyone happy. Which means she's acceptionally "good" most of the time, and "sweet" with those outside the family. We have to really watch her to find out what she's *really* thinking, because she flies way under the radar.

Cute Leksa story from tonight. I was tucking her in and she asked if she could hop up and get some water. I told her she could, but she said, "Could you please stay here and wait for me? I want to talk you in some more." Here and all this time, I thought I was talking HER in! Ever since she came home from Ukraine she's said it's called "talking you in" when you say goodnight at bedtime. I expected that one to fly away long ago, but I guess it just makes too much sense to change that one. Oh, and she invented butterfly hugs. It only follows that if butterflies kiss, then they should hug too. You have to gently pat/tap each other's back when you hug for that one.

In other words, Year Two has been awesome. The waves just seem a whole lot smaller now that we all know each other and love each other and trust each other... I don't particularly like the fact that they're growing up so fast, but that's just a daily reminder for me to seize the day and to remember that the joy is in the journey, not the destination.

Two Years Home!!!!!!!!!!!

Two Whole Whoppin' Years Home today!

I'm a little disappointed though, because Adam is a sick puppy today. He's feeling like a Mac Truck hit him. Sore throat, runny nose, achey body. He's been sacked out on the couch drinking tea.

I have to say, though, I look forward to times the kids are under the weather. It's a great opportunity to bond. I imagine every mom extra-enjoys doting on her sick kids even though she's sad their sick. It's just nice to be needed, and nice to have such vulnerable kiddos. It's also good for the kids to let their guards down and let themselves "need" their moms a little over-time for a day or two. Great bonding times for everyone.

Still, so much for my big celebration plans, *sigh*, but I guess they'll have to wait until our Star Patient is feeling better. I'll try to get some pics posted later on with a better 2 Year Home update....

Laundry Depression

I meant to post after Leks' birthday. But I just couldn't. It was hard on this old mama. I cried the night before Liana's birthday, but I sobbed and threw myself an all-out pitty party the night before Aleksa's. I guess I felt the grief of both girls' birthdays at the same time. Two in one week is ROUGH. John had to do some extra counseling for the girls - they were pretty wide-eyed watching me have a nervous breakdown in front of them. I told Adam he was my only good kid that week. He thought that was funny.

Anyway, that wasn't the only thing bothering me. My washing machine has been broken until today. It has been dead for almost three weeks. Since we're renting (groaning here), the maintenance fellows can take their times, you see. So, we've been roughin' it here. I've been having the kids wash out their own clothes each night, so theirs hasn't piled up too badly. Mine and John's on the other hand, has been horrible.

Now, I don't know how most people feel about laundry piling up, but I HATE it. I mean, Really. I've seen lots of people do all their washing and throw the clothes in piles for a few days before they get around to folding and putting them away. I can't handle that. As soon as I hear the buzzer of the dryer, I pull out the clothes, smoothe out the wrinkles, fold them up and put them away. I Never (except where someone is terribly sick or there's an emergency), just throw the fresh-out-of-the-dryer clothes in a basket to be dealt with later. I can just "feel" the wrinkles settling into my quickly cooling clothes. Can't stand it. I hafta go take care of them. Maybe it's because I hate ironing? Who knows.

And when there are too many clothes in the dirty clothes basket, it really starts to bother me. It sorta makes me feel like my whole house is out of control if I know I have laundry to do. But on the other hand, you can usually tell the state of my mental health by checking how much laundry I have that I have left to do. You can't tell by what isn't put away, because as I said, it is *always* put away, but if I'm not feeling good emotionally, my dirty laundry tells on me. So, I guess I don't know which comes first. Are my blues caused by the laundry, or is the laundry caused by the blues? Well, in this case it was the blues caused by the laundry. I know. I'm weird. But I also know that all of you all have your own little quirks too, so there! ;O) (But if any of you have a similar tendency, I'd love to hear from you so I can tell others that I'm not alone in the world!)

Anyway, the piles and mountains of laundry around here have been really bothering me. Makin' me grumpy, and out of control like, and it has just plain thrown off my routine. *hmph* I've gotten a better respect for those poor pioneer women who had to go on down by the river with their lye soap and their wash boards. How did they Ever get anything else done!??! The broken washer coupled with all the kids getting way too old on me last week has really thrown me for a loop. The washer is fixed now though, and I'm sooooooooooo looking forward to empty baskets again! And no more kid birthdays until January. Whew.

Been getting more packages for the Ukraine package. I got a package of undies today from someone in ENGLAND. Wow! That makes three countries so far! England, Canada and the US. This has been sooooo fun for us! The kids are getting excited! I could kick myself though - we went "back home" this weekend to visit and I had been stashing some shoes/undies in my dad's basement, and I FORGOT them when we left. GROAN. Not sure exactly what to do about that. We're headed back again on the 26th, so I guess we'll be sending two sets of boxes. Oh well!

Pinata Party

Tonight we had the neighborhood over for the girls' birthdays. Hate to combine their special days, but ya know, two giant shin-digs in the same week is a bit much...

So, we had a "Princess" pinata out in the yard with eight kids, plus three moms and a dad stayed to watch. One of the older girls (she's 10 or 11) knocked it down, and John had to drop kick the thing a few times to get all the candy out.

Now all the kids are flying all around the yard and neighborhood with their loot bags and I'm pretending to be uploading the pictures onto the computer. I can tell the kids have been home a while... I still have pictures on my camera from June! I'll get around to it one of these days...

World Travellin' Leksa Lu

Gotta quick share what my still-five-but-almost-six year old just came in the house telling me....

"Mom, I just had a long journey. I wanted to go to Persia to get a Magic Carpet ride, but I went too far and went to India. Then I rode my motorcycle to Tibet and drove around in the mountains a while."

Mama sat there blinking her eyes at how much thought had to have gone into that itinerary.

I guess I won't be pulling that world map off the kitchen table, or cutting down on the library runs any time soon! It was fun to see the stories and the map become real enough for her to invent her own adventure! COOL!

Our New Eight Year Old!

Liana's birthday was yesterday. We have an 8 year old now!

Which is happy for her, but sad for me. I hate my kids' birthdays. Isn't that selfish and horrible-sounding?! I don't like them turning a year older! I want time to stop. On Saturday night as the kids were settling down before bedtime, I actually started crying right there in front of everybody.

Liana loved it.

She felt like an adult or something since the reason I gave her for crying was that she was growing up. She assured me that she'd bring me her children to play with and rock, and that she'd always love me and take care of me when I'm old. Oy. Somehow that really scares me to think that she'd be the one to take care of me in my old age... she'd feed me half of my soup and then get distracted by something more fun and I'd waste away to nothing! lol! She doesn't sit still very long in other words! She's come a long way, and *can* sit still if she *wants* to, but it has to be for a *very* good reason!

Speaking of sitting. Here's another Liana story. (Liana, if you are an adult reading this, I HOPE YOU'VE OUTGROWN THIS BY NOW...) There was a fellowship dinner after church yesterday, and Liana and I were sitting across from each other and who was sitting next to me but Sean. The Sean. I made a few comments about my chair and Sean offered to switch his chair with mine. Sweet of him, but I declined the offer. Liana told me, (casting a batted eye toward Sean), "I'll switch spots with you, Mom! I'd love to sit next to Sean!

You shoulda seen how fast Sean finished his meal and got outta there.

Later I let Liana hand out her treat bags for her friends. I had written everyone's name on them, and I happened to catch Liana rummaging through her sack of treat bags trying to keep up with Sean saying, "Sean, I have one for you too! I'm not chasing you, Sean, I really do have treats for you! Come back here!"

BWAAAAH! LOL!

Metcha Day Anniversary

It's been a busy few days. My birthday was Friday. (34!) John had the day off from work because his company was sponsoring a picnic at the zoo! So! I got to go to the zoo for my birthday! It was a hot day, but everyone had a good time, and I got to do a little shopping on the way home. Plus, John drove us past where he works. Horrible commute, and I wouldn't do it for all the money in the wide world. I h.a.t.e. city driving. Hate it. So, it's a good thing he's him and I'm me! :O)

Anyway, the next day was the 2 year anniversary of the day we met the kids. That really hit me. The anniversary of the day we MET the kids seems more "whoa" to me than the anniversary of the day we brought them home. It means, "Before this, these kids were not in our lives." Unreal to me that it has only been two years. It's nothing! It's a blink! And yet, to our family, they have been the Only years we've had together. Two Enormous years. Every month has been different... a different dynamic, a different feel, a different "texture" to our family. Thankfully the texture has been Smoother lately! ;O)

We celebrated the event by finding a teeny little Ukrainian deli about 30 minutes away. It had all of two tables for us to choose from, but there were a few aisles of Ukrainian foods that we could browse and shop. We found some Ukrainian Juice which we about jumped out of our skins with excitement to find. None of our favorite "Banana" but they did have "banana-pineapple" which is reminiscient enough of the Real Deal to send us back down Memory Lane pretty heavily.

We also found little circle ring-shaped cookies that the kids call "bubliky" (someone know the real name, or know if this is correct?) The kids were thrilled to have found those, and couldn't contain their excitement. The ladies behind the counter raised their eyebrows a few times at us! ;O) They also spoke Russian, which the kids enjoyed, but they got really over-stimulated by all of the above. Liana was especially over-done, but we all enjoyed a good meal of borscht, bliny (I think that's what it's called...), and a few other things. Including some beer for Adam. That was an accident. We don't read Ukrainian you know. ;O) He took one taste of his bottle (we all chose our own bottled beverage out of a cooler), and said, "Yuck! Beer!" Oops. The lady behind the counter said it was non-alcoholic though, so we felt a *little* better, but still!

Hopscotch

It's been our routine lately for us all to go outside and hang out in the afternoons if it isn't too hot out.

Yesterday we were out in the driveway playing Hopscotch. Adam wasn't so sure about playing it until I had to do a quick Google search to recall all the rules. It said that Hopscotch was played by Roman soldiers to help them train in nimbleness in their footwork. He changed his tune then, after he heard it was originally for soldiers training for battle! I was really glad about that, as it is reallllllly good for his balance. He is a TON more balanced and nimble than when he first came home. He couldn't stand on one foot for longer than about three seconds, and I'm not exaggerating. When the PT tested him, he could barely do it at all, and Flunked the test big time, testing at about the 3yo level on that particular skill. It was horrible. With the exercises and stretches we've been having him do, however, he has improved tremendously. He showed off the other night how long he could stand on one foot, and John and I about fell over ourselves... He's doing things now that I never thought he would.

Anyway, back to the hopscotch game. Liana was trying to drop her rock on the number 4 and just couldn't do it. I gave her several tries, but even when she couldn't do it, she insisted on having more tries. Aleksa was sitting on my lap watching, and I was beginning to chuckle at Liana's determination. I said something like, "One more try, huh, Liana?" And then I began to add, "Oh yeah, I forgot..." when Aleksa turned around to me and finished my sentence for me, "She's a stubborn Ukrainian, Mama." I often tell the kids they are "Stubborn Ukrainians" when the persevere so hard about things. My dad always tells me I'm a "Stubborn Norwegian" so I guess it's a carry-over from him. I thought it was funny though, that Leks was so matter-of-fact about it.

By the way, Aleksa won. Liana lost interst after not being able to get her rock where she wanted it, and Adam couldn't quite get his rock where he wanted it either. Leks loved it though, and continued playing it by herself long after the other two scrambled off to find something more exciting to do.

I am Contraband!

Got an email from a friend today. She's teaching some Ed classes in China for a few weeks this summer, and is there right now. She wrote to tell me that evidently there must be something horrible about my blog that the Chinese government doesn't like... She has tried to access it without success since she arrived.

She said she also tried to do a Google search on Tiennemen Square and nothing would pop up for her. Everything was "Page Not Found."

I find that fascinating.

So tonight, I'm thanking God for the freedoms I have to learn, read, think, say and do (pretty much) what I want in this country. I so easily forget that there are those who don't have that luxury...

Clean Garage

Leksa was playing, and Liana was sweeping the garage when up the driveway comes a police officer. I was sitting just inside the garage, so he drove alllll the way up the driveway (which is rather long) to talk to me. He wanted to know if I'd seen a white van with anyone in it who have been knocking on peoples' doors. Nope. I hadn't seen it.

As he was getting ready to pull away, he noticed Liana and the broom. He says to her, "Well, you keep on cleaning young lady!" Liana looks up at him bewildered and saucer-eyed. I quickly nodded and said, "Yeah, Liana, the policeman said so!" and then I gave him a double thumbs up behind her back. Then he added, "And I'll be back tomorrow to check out your work!" He laughed all the way back down the driveway...

I've never had a better swept garage....

"Liana Loves Sean"

This week at church we're having VBS... So tonight during craft time, evidently Liana wrote on her project, "Liana loves Sean." Sean is an "older" boy of about 12... very smart, handsome, etc. Well, she didn't just write it. She said it to him and everyone at the table. And she batted her eyelashes. And pretty much scared the poor boy To Death. He got so embarassed his ears got red!

So, on the way home, I asked her if she maybe embarassed him a bit, and asked her how it made her look herself. (I had been told the whole story from her teacher...) She hadn't considered that. The more she thought about it, the more mortified she got. I mean Mortified. I could see the humiliation wash over her face. She crinkled her face and kept saying, "Oh, this makes my guts run out." (Evidently, her English isn't quite perfect yet! John and I laugh at how many expressions she uses wrongly with the word "guts.") She continued kicking herself and feeling mortified all the way through bedtime. I think this was the first time I've seen her feeling anywhere like this. She's my big almost 8-yr-old, and it is beginning to show!

I tried to make her feel better by telling her that when I was her age, I probably would have had a crush on Sean too, and that she had picked a good one to like, etc. And I told her I liked other boys too at her age. She asked me what my parents told her about it. I had to tell her that I was too shy to even talk to the boys I liked, so my parents didn't have to say a thing. That didn't make her feel any better. lol!

I told John later that I really liked this new Liana we're beginning to see. The old one wouldn't have cared one hoot if Sean was embarrassed or not, as long as she was having a good ole time. It's definitely a new leaf she's turning... I like it!

23 Months Home

Wow, just one more month and we'll have made it to Two Whole Years Home. I just plain can't believe it.

We've been having smooth sailing until a few days ago. Some trust issues have come up with Adam that we probably would have expected to have happened a year ago, but not THIS year. I guess two steps forward three steps back? I guess with our kiddos, the stuff they've dealt with in their short lives will just pop up from time to time and remind us that they do indeed carry baggage of sorts.

That said, however, I'd say that our Adam has made gigantic strides this month/summer with almost everything. The relationship I have with him has never been better. He has made some good friends here in the neighborhood, though his "best" friends are still lots younger than he. They are about 8 years old, and that is about how old he is emotionally and intellectually. It's just unfortunate that he is packaged in a tall 11 1/2 yo body. It would make all our lives a lot easier, I'm sure!

John was just telling me yesterday that Adam was reading a see-through plastic sign from behind, and could read the sign even though it was backwards. That's big, big, big for him. He's been doing great with his reading. Math is still an absolute killer for him, but if we let him use his math blocks/rods, he can figure out the answers... wrote memory is a killer for him. It goes excruciatingly slow for him.

With Liana turning 8 in just a few weeks, that makes my oldest two seem more like twins in a lot of ways. And actually, with Aleksa making such progress with her reading, etc., it almost feels like triplets. Not *quite*, but almost. In another year it just very well may! But, I expect that Adam will cruise ahead a bit in this year too, so who knows.

Liana is doing really well too. That Super Strong Will of hers is losing its grip on her a bit, and I have seen her really yield that will several times recently. It will probably always be a part of her personality, but I know she is actually "working on it" now. She reflexively sassed our pastor's wife the other day and since I was *right* there to witness it, I took her in the bathroom for a chit-chat. We were in there all of about three seconds and she was genuinely sorry. Her conscience had started to bother her before my line of questioning started in. (We always try to start our "lectures" with a bunch of questions. Gets them to think, and their hearts are reached more effectively.) So, yay, our bathroom visit was only a few minutes long, and she marched HERSELF (as in, without me telling her to), over to Mrs. B. and apologized, and later colored her a picture to further demonstrate her remorse. YAY Liana!!! I know kids born and raised here in the USA who would NEVER, EVER have humbled themselves like that. Very proud Mama. :O)

Leks is Leks. Flying under the radar as usual, but has been caught a few times more often lately. She'll ask me if she can do something, and of course, being a good mom, I say "no way" to some of her requests. Well, she'll sometimes *very quietly* do it anyway. She figures if I'm busy I won't notice or something. So, I've had to pay extra attention to her lately. With her developing intellect has come extra skill at getting away with things.

She's been really maturing lately. Instead of being afraid of every little thing as she was a year or more ago (I would need to go back and re-read my updates), she is actually more mature than a lot of other kids I've been meeting her age. She's social, smart, articulate, creative. (A little too creative though... she drew me a picture the other day of a mama and child... and the mama had all her parts... *cough, cough* I didn't know what it was, and when I asked her, she said that part was for her to go to the bathroom. Alrighty then...) She's also TALL. She's in the 75th percentile for height, and when we brought her home from Ukraine, she wasn't even on the chart for height. Liana is still a few inches taller than she is,s but I have a feeling Leks will cruise past her in a few years.

It's been a good summer. Lately we've hit some bumps, but ya know, no family is perfect. I wouldn't trade mine for anything!

Parting is such sweet sorrow

Oh Bro-THER. You shoulda seen my kids at breakfast...

The girls usually sit on one side of the table, and Adam on the other. This morning Adam asked Liana, "Please, won't you sit on my side with me today? You always sit with Aleksa!"

Liana sighed, turned to Aleksa and said, "Aleksa, I'll miss you, but I should sit with Adam today." And she gave her sister a big hug. Leks told her she'd miss her too. And it wasn't a "quick" hug. It was an I'm-probably-not-going-to-see-you-for-a-year kind of a hug.

It's so hard being separated like that.

LOL

Bunny Trails

Woke up a little later today. Heard the shower running downstairs (Adam) and knew my day had started without me. Groan. I need to start going to bed earlier.

Just wanted to recap my day so far since I've chuckled more than once at how many bunny trails I've been on today. My "summer schedule" isn't working out so great for Mama. The kids love it, but I'm feeling a little discombubbled. (Is that a word?)

Anyway, we did accomplish our morning routine - it just got done later and breakfast started a little later than usual. But it's summer, right? ;O) After we ate, the kids did their summer math/reading routine. That took all of about an hour. Tops. They also have a little writing they need to do.

After that, we had our read-aloud time. We're re-reading "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" since Aleksa said she didn't remember it when we read it the first time. For SHAME, we all said. It's still the older kids' all-time favorite. So, I decided that would be on the summer reading list. Anyway, when you read that book, you MUST, I repeat, MUST have a candybar. We bought each kid a giant Symphany bar of their own to last throughout the book. So, yesterday was the first day of reading, and I made the mistake of saying that they could keep it in their room and sneak a bite here and there if they wanted to, but that the book was 30 chapters long, and the candy had to last that long. Well, oops. Leksa ate almost the whole thing before I caught on. I took it away from her when she had three little segments left. Oy. Anyway, today Mama confiscated the chocolate after our reading was done. We need some more lessons in Self Control evidently!

After that, it was getting awful hot, so I had the kids help me put together some mixes for some future baking. I've been putting the dry ingredients of often-made baked goods into big ziploc bags so when it is time to bake, I don't have to mess with flour and sugar, etc. I've made up mixes for pancakes, chocolate chip cookies, tortillas (I've been making my own; YUMMY), granola, bread sticks, and today we did mixes for sugar cookies, peanut butter cookies, and bunch of batches of bread for the bread machine. Feels good to have all that work already done. The kids each hold out a ziploc bag while I measure and dump. So we have three batches of each of these goodies squirreled away. Some of 'em we have 6 each. I need more flour!

After my mix-making extravaganza, I was noticing the sticky feet thing from the gross stuff on the floor. Flour and sugar on the bottom of my feet sorta gross me out. ;O) So, I had the kids take out all the chairs from the kitchen, and I swept and wanted to mop. Oops, I looked at the time, and couldn't believe it was after our regular lunch time. Great. So, I drop the mop idea (for now), and make lunch. I called in the kids to eat, and instead of dragging in all the chairs, we ate our lunches UNDER the table on the floor. Cool. I got to be functional and a "cool mom" all at the same time. The kids thought it was great that Mama was getting so psycho.

While under the table, I noticed that the plastic see-through table cloth on the table (I've mentioned it before), is getting grungy. It needs to be taken off and cleaned. I also notice that both of my girls are wearing skirts. Again. They're both on a big-time skirt kick. They won't wear play pants anymore lately. Which means they have all of about three skirts to choose from. They don't care if they don't match anything else they have or if they are dirty, they like 'em, and say they are more princess-like. Not to mention cooler. (It's been super-hot lately). Great. I wonder how much fabric I have in my stash to make them a few other play skirts. I don't want the neighbors talking... So, I tell the girls that after lunch we should go up to my room and check the fabric stash. Adam asks what he can do. I tell him he could pop in a dvd to watch while us girls are scoping the fabric. Cool.

So, after lunch, we march upstairs. I have forgotten about mopping. Oops. We find a few things, and Adam and the girls all enjoy a Christmas dvd that I wouldn't usually let them watch except at Christmas. Aftwerwards, we all go downstairs, and I notice that I have kitchen chairs all over the livingroom. Oh, Shelly, you're such a scatter-brain today. So, I finish mopping. I'm currently letting the floor dry while the kids are outside playing. After I'm done typing, I'll get the chairs back under the table, make sure to wash down the table cloth better, and then start supper. John will be home in an hour and a half. Still need to water the tomatoes, return an email and dry some laundry.

Even though it was a "fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants day," I'm not sure I would have changed a thing. I loved every minute.

Odd-ball mothers

Once our school year wrapped up and we started our light work of just math and reading for the rest of the summer, the kids were thrilled to be able to go outside and play with the neighbor kids earlier in the day. That isn't the case though. Because now the neighbor kids are away at day care all day instead of off at school. Makes me sad that there aren't more moms out there who stay home with their kids, (or rather, WANT to stay home even.) It doesn't bother me when moms HAVE to work for one reason or another, but by and large I've been meeting women who think staying at home is beneath them. They have a degree! Can't waste that! They'd go crazy all day with kids! They'd be bored all day. Blah, blah, blah.

One of the neighbor ladies told me this week that she was glad she didn't have more kids because she couldn't handle the two she had, and didn't really relate to kids very well. Her own children! It made me incredibly sad.

Guess I've been feeling rather odd-ballish lately for my choice to stay home. Really wishing being June Cleaver-like were a little more in vogue. I'm definitely an odd duck around here.

Creatures in the Wall

Woke up this morning to the sounds of a Critter of some sort crawling Inside My Bedroom Wall. Freaked Me Out. I tried really hard to dismiss it, and convince myself that I was still half-asleep but when I heard something actually shake itself off, let me tell you, I was UP. I had visions of mice, or even *gulp* a Hamster scurrying around chewing wires in the walls and dying in there - or worse yet, MULTIPLYING.

I couldn't get myself down to Adam's room fast enough to check and see if Susie Cute was safe and sound in her little cage. She was. *whew* Or maybe not "whew" - at least I would know that Susie was a FRIENDLY rodent inside my wall, and not a nasty vile thing that perhaps came a-nesting because I'm not a good enough housekeeper. *waaaaah!*

So, by this time John is awake. I come back into our room and he asks, "What is that noise?" (Yikes, he heard it too! It must be really there! I had thought maybe I could pretend I was imagining things and go back to bed.) I tell him I think there is a mouse or something in the wall (we are in a rental house afterall!)

He valiantly comes to my rescue. I wonder how he's going to get the thing OUT. About right them I'm ready to pass him the sledgehammer. He decides to take a more conservative approach and instead look out the window. Our room is on the second story. He tries to look straight down, and thinks he sees something, so he takes off the screen so he can crane his head out. There is a small hooded vent of some sort just a few feet below the window. (Dryer vent?) And! We see a mama and papa BLUEBIRD (with twigs/grass in their beaks), sitting on our satellite below that. They were looking up at us wondering who we were and what we thought we were doing here. (And evidently did not appreciate us interrupting their busy morning.)

Let me just say that the thought of The Bluebirds of Happiness nesting in our vent is a MUCH better feeling than the thought of mice in the walls. Talk about opposite extremes! Nevertheless, I'm up for the day. Way too much adrenaline coursing through my veins.

Leksa fell off her bike

...and she landed on her Ear.

How did she do that? I dunno. But there isn't a scratch on her except for on her ear. She cried and cried. Hard to be a good mama when you're trying so hard to stifle a chuckle... This is the same girl who slammed her ear in the car door. Still scratching my head over that one too.

Full Circle

Things have come full circle to a point. Yesterday I was telling the kids what Independence Day was all about, and explained that one of the ways we are "independent" is that we have the right to vote for our own president. Then I asked the kids if they remember coming with us to vote. I then chuckled thinking of the first time we took them to vote - it was the Presidential election a few years ago, when the kids first came home. The kids had been *angels* waiting in line, etc., and after we left the building, Liana grumbled, "Presents, No!" Evidently she had thought she was going to be getting a Present, not a President.

Anyway, I told that story to the kids yesterday, and Liana sure laughed that she had misunderstood me. Kind of fun to be at the point where THEY are enjoying the humor of what they said/thought those first months home.

Mikhail

Kids love to tell *anybody* stuff that they themselves find interesting. Adam is chatterer. Unfortunatly he isn't the most articulate child we have, and therefore can't always string together his words in the most appropriate fashion.

Yesterday at church we had a fellowship meal after the service. Adam sat with us near his Wednesday night kids' club teachers. To make conversation, he said to them, "My name Mikhail and my papa name Mikhail."

Major throat clearing by his mama.

Had an impromptu chitchat with him about making sure he includes the words "Ukrainian" or "first" or "birth" before the word "papa," because his "Papa" was sitting right next to him and his name is John, not Mikhail. I also reminded him that his birth/Ukrainian/middle name is Mikhail. I guess I'm a little protective of my hubby's feelings too, and figured of the two of us (John or me, I mean), that little reminder needed to come from me.

Thought you'd all want to hear this story as a balance or contrast to Liana's "real mama" comment the other morning.

Susie Found!

Forgot to mention... Susie the Hamster is safely back in her cage. John made us all stay out of the house Wednesday night (same day we noticed her gone), so he could search the house (quietly) by himself. He found her between the washer and the dryer. She was super thirsty and hungry, but she was ok. Everyone was very relieved. Especially me, as I wasn't looking forward to sleeping in a house with a loose rodent running around... (No offence, Susie Cute!)

Real Moms

Just have a quick breakfast time story that I HAVE to write down quick...

The kids always refer to their birth mom as "Mama Zhana." Well, this morning, Liana said to me, "Mama, she's not really my mama, I shouldn't call her that." I waited to hear what she was going to say. "I already have a real mama, and that's you. She's more like a step-mother or something, but you are our real mama."

After I teared up and gave her a big hug and kiss, I sat her down and told her that it was ok to call her Mama Zhana because she'll always be a part of her, and that I knew she loved her very much. I also told her that I was glad that she loved me, and that I was also glad that she loved Mama Zhana, because that meant that there was an awful lot of love in her heart. At that, she smiled really big and gave me a big hug.

22 Months Home

I sorta missed the 22 Month Home post. Oops. We were away for the weekend (went back home to see our dads for Father's Day.)

But! I thought I'd post some pictures I took on Friday. I'm sending off a bunch of pictures with the kids' yearly report, (which I'm sending early since we just moved). (Btw, a yearly report is the report we have to send to the Ukrainian Consulate to update them on the kids' welfare: health, accomplishments, personality development, etc.) I had the top pic made into an 8x10 for our mantel. Just love it!

Not sure what to say about the kids... We're all getting to the point where we're just not analyzing them like we used to. Though I should mention that Aleksa, who started sounding out words on her own at Christmas time, is now reading at about the second grade level right now! Never, ever thought she'd have had this easy of a time in school from what we knew of her when we first brought her home. Remember how worried I was that she was, um, well, You Know... ;O) I'm so happy to say I was dead wrong about her! She's a little smartie!


My buddy Adam came through for John for Father's Day just what he gave me; He told John he was thankful that we adopted him and launched into his "what if" story of what would have happened if we hadn't adopted him - on Father's Day no less. He has such a tender heart. He also has been talking more and more about the boys left behind at the orphanage. "What if they don't get adopted?" Those questions were tough on ME to ask, so I can't imagine how a boy of 11 is processing that one. He has several times asked me to stop everything and pray with him for those boys. He was practically in tears each time, and I don't need to tell you how they left me!

Liana! Since a picture is worth a thousand words, I'll just let it tell you how she's doing! :O) She's loving the new neighborhood and woods. We just saw a deer on Sunday night right across the street from us in this very field where she and the others are standing. She's been a busy, happy little girl this summer. The girls in the neighborhood are really nice, and she's slightly older than a few of them, and has (much to her delight) developed quite a following... ;O)

Well, this is our Lolly. I call her that because it is short for Lalichka, or la-la which means "baby." She's got a loose upper front tooth, and I choke up every time I think of it coming out. She's not s'posed to ever get big! I made her pose for dozens of pictures out on the lawn the other night when she told me it was loose enough to maybe come out. I even took a video of her. I don't want that dumb tooth to come out. Why, oh why can't children stay forever five?

Bubbles in the window

I was sitting quietly today looking out our livingroom window enjoying our scenery (see mother's day photos!) The kids were outside playing and John was taking a nap, so it was just me, my comfy chair, and a fabulous view. Then suddenly, a few soap bubbles gently floated past my window. I couldn't see the kids, but I could see their bubbles. It made me smile. I'm a MOM! I still just plain can't believe it. AND! My kids are happy and healthy and safe. Those few little soap bubbles proved it.

Bubbles in the window

I was sitting quietly today looking out our livingroom window enjoying our scenery (see mother's day photos!) The kids were outside playing and John was taking a nap, so it was just me, my comfy chair, and a fabulous view. Then suddenly, a few soap bubbles gently floated past my window. I couldn't see the kids, but I could see their bubbles. It made me smile. I'm a MOM! I still just plain can't believe it. AND! My kids are happy and healthy and safe. Those few little soap bubbles proved it.

Mother's Intuition?

I was sitting on the couch today and Aleksa was playing on it next to me, but she was getting a little nuts-o. Liana was in the kitchen supposedly finishing up her math. Finally I said to Aleksa, "Liana, that's enough." Liana, who didn't know I called her sister the wrong name, thought I was talking to her and called in from the kitchen, "Mommy, how did you know I was being bad!? You weren't even IN here!"

Cool! Two birds with one stone! :O)

(Ok, how many of YOU would have fessed up?)

Breaking in the Neighbors...

The thing about moving and starting over somewhere, is that you are constantly retelling "your story." Who even knows how many times I've told people about having adopted the kids, that we're homeschooling, etc. We're peculiar to people, and we have (all at once) been bombarded with questions.

And we're fine with that. (Obviously, or else I sure wouldn't be blogging!) We're proud of our kiddos, the progress they've made, and proud of where they're from. But, we've also had some very uncomfortable questions lately. There's this fine line though, where questions get inappropriate. One asked (in front of my kids) what happened to their "real" parents. Still trying to come up with a polite answer to that one! Others have asked about "birth" parents, which is better, but I scratch my head wondering why they need to know that. *sigh* (Btw, if you didn't catch that, WE, John and Shelly Fisher are Real Parents. Not a pretend bone in our bodies.)

I let the kids play in a neighbor's yard the other evening and the mom came over with the kids (and hers) and told me they had all had a great talk about where they were from, about the orphanage, etc. I have to tell you. I almost freaked out. (Not really, I was very nice. But inside, I freaked.) There are certain people that are *so* curious that they pump the kids with questions, and appear to enjoy doing so when John and I are not present. A while back someone sorta took Adam under their wing and pumped him with questions before I happened to notice... That person told me that they were just trying to be someone that Adam could come and talk to if he wanted to. (Even though they'd only seen Adam like Three times. Ever.) I told her that I was da mama, and John was da papa and that we ourselves are there for him when he wants to talk. The mama bear in me came out that time.

And so yesterday (this is a riot!), the neighbor boy comes over (he's probably 7). It was his last day of school, so that was the big topic of conversation among the kiddos. Anyway, this little guy is a Brain In a Half, and will probably be a lawyer or senator some day. But, he said to me, "Um, Shelly, I was wondering. When you school the children, do they just get to play all day?" I about spit my koolaid I was so amused! I said, "Um why do you ask?" He said, "Well, I was just wondering if they just played all day." I said, "Garett, if your mom was your teacher, would she let you play all day?" And he told me "no way." Then I asked him if he thought I would let them do that. I guess that satisfied him, but then he asked, "So, what level of math are they doing right now?" "Um, Garett, why do you ask?" "Oh, I'm just wondering. Sister Margaret is so hard! If we get anything wrong, she really gets on our tail!" At this point Liana looked at Garett funny, and then she looked at me. I chuckled and said to Liana, "Of course YOUR math teacher NEVER has gotten on YOUR tail, has she?" To which she replied, "Oh YES, she has!" lol!

Anyway, I let Garett know that just because we homeschool, doesn't mean he can quiz us. I have since instructed the kids that if anyone "quizzes" them (and several adults have done so upon hearing they are homeschooled), that they are to respond, "My mom says I don't have to answer people who quiz us just because we're homeschooled."

We'll break in the neighbors eventually! ;O)

Raising the White flag

Well, there's more than one way of skinning a cat. I kept thinking about Aunt Millie's "bleach bucket" and then I kept envisioning one of my Three Stooges tipping it over, or playing in it. The laundry area is right outside their bedroom doors. Even though it is an enclosed area, there aren't any deadbolts to keep them out! ;O) Those memories of Adam's late-night bathroom bubble/soap experiments are still too fresh!

So! I had to get a little more creative. And, my creativity brought me down to the shoe store where we bought Mr. Adam some sandals. Voila! No gray socks to wash! (At least 'til fall!) Happy Day!

(I fully intend on re-reading all your suggestions come cold-weather season though! THANK YOU everyone for all your ideas!)

White Whites?

Ok, I'm doing laundry. And Adam's socks are GRAY. How do those of you with busy, busy boys keep your whites WHITE? I think I'm missing something. Do I just have to buy new socks every other week or what's the deal? I'm dead serious, I'm just plain clueless on this one! Please HELP!!!!!!!

Papa of the Year

John is an awesome Papa. I knew it before, but last night clinched it.

He had an impromptu made-up game for all of us. The kids were each told to write *very* short messages to both of us parents. Then, when they were done, John took the messages to me, and he helped the kids write them out with their bodies laying on the floor. So, the letter L, for example, was Adam laying straight, and Liana laying perpendicular at his feet. Get the idea? Ok, well, I had to guess the messages, and then guess who wrote each one. Both the older kids wrote "I love Mama" on theirs. Can't remember what Leks wrote. But, when it was my turn to look at the messages for John, I had them write them out with their bodies standing up. (So, the letter T would be someone standing with their arms outstretched on each side). Anyway, the older two wrote "I love Papa" on theirs, but Leksa had more of an interesting secret code. She wrote, "Big dot pit." ?. *shrugs* Not sure what she meant by "Big dot pit," but John and I sure got a chuckle out of it.

THEN, it was OUR turn to have the kids figure out what we were writing. John and I took turns writing out "ICE CREAM." (You should see John Fisher trying to act out the letter E!) ;O) They carefully had those pencils going trying to figure out the word, and when they realized it said "ICE CREAM," they all asked, "Are we getting ice cream?" And when we nodded, they all shrieked with excitement! It was better than Christmas!

One of those sweet memories I'll have forever...

Adam's scar, plus weekend odds and ends

We took a trip into The Cities today to pick up some clothes for the girls. They're growing like weeds and were in dire need of a few things. Good thing John drove. They had detours and construction and all kinds of nasty City Things. We wound up ditching our pre-printed directions altogether and just kinda winged it. Very thankful John drove. AND, we saw a Chipotle restaurant right next to the shopping area we went to. So, there's my hope that John will take me again sometime... we LOVE Chipotle! :O)

After our shopping expedition, the kids all had a water fight outside. It's super hot here, so it felt wonderful, I'm sure. John and I pretty much just vegged for the rest of the afternoon. Not a huge Memorial Day extravaganza, but it was alright.

Adam showed us a scar on his upper arm yesterday. We try not to ask about his scars - he has many - but if he offers up their stories here and there, we listen with pricked ears. This one, I had to laugh about. Evidently, he had been looking around the orphanage for his sisters, and when he found Aleksa (er, Zina), he picked her up. Well, the Little Missy didn't want to be picked up, so, she bit him. And hence the scar. And let me tell you, this is a HumDinger of a scar on his arm. Just goes to show how far Aleksa has come in these past few years. She was the Warrior Princess when we met. She even bit me *hard* on the shoulder when I put her on the potty at the apartment in Kiev on our way home. (She wanted to go potty "na ulitsa" - outside.) Yeah, RIGHT. So, I forced her on the pot, and she leaned forward and took a chunk out of my shoulder. Anyway, I had to laugh a bit looking at Adam's arm. Brought back memories for me too, as well as painted a picture in my brain of what Zina was like before she got herself a mama. ;O) (Too bad I can't bottle up into words what a sunshine girl she has become... she'd never dream of doing such a thing now!)

Oh! We met a family at church on Sunday who adopted a buncha kids. I can't WAIT to get to know these folks better. They have two absolutely beautiful older girls (like 14 and 10?) from Cambodia, a 4yo girl from Nepal, and a 2yo boy from China! They also homeschool their kiddos, so I'm anxious to compare notes, stories and share some support. I think both of our families were shocked and excited to have found each other!

Oh! And we met a Ukrainian lady yesterday too! She doesn't speak Ukrainian or Russian, but boy does she look and dress like one! Poofy hair (hope she never reads this), dressed up to the 9's, and with Adam and Liana's coloring. Also very typical Ukrainian facial features; almond-shaped brown eyes, etc.) Our kids offered to teach her Ukrainian. I thought that was cute since our kids know about 14 words! (Ok, maybe they *understand* more than that, and can pull out some vocabulary once in a while, but mostly it is gone). The kids said "Do pobachina!" to her when we left. (That's "Good bye," btw, but I have no idea how to spell it).

Anyway, that's the scoop so far. It was a pretty quiet weekend, but after all the moving fuss, we've been needing that around here lately!

Weekend update

This last weekend, we went back "home" for a farewell party that our church threw for us. Talk about emotional basketcases! One of those who wanted to wish us well wanted to share a memory he had of our Adam. I have to pass it on to you all, since I think it speaks volumes of how far the kids have come in their lives.

Last year, the kids were playing at this family's farm, and Adam reached up into a corn stalk, took down an ear of corn, detassled it, and then ate the whole thing, corn cob and all. Raw. And apparently with great gusto as well. What born and bred American boy do you know that would do that? But a boy who has known great hunger in his life considered such a find an actual feast. He does leave apple cores on his lunch plate now... most of the time. So, he isn't quite "that bad" anymore, but it sure tells a lot about how far our kids have come in their short lives.

Since this weekend, Liana has been a Monster. She is a control-seeker. She absolutely must be in charge, and has had to be reminded *CONSTANTLY* that she's only 7 and isn't the mama or papa. She loves the new house, etc., but she did not like leaving people that she loves behind, and this weekend was a reminder that she lost some thread of control over her life by having to leave everyone.

When we pulled away to come home on Sunday night, Aleksa told me that she changed her mind and wanted to stay, and that she was going to miss her friends too much. I told her that Mamas don't go anywhere without their babies, so she needed to come with. She shrugged, said, "Ok," and off we went.

Big changes are tough on little kids - and us adults too. But, well, I guess I see more positives out of this move than anything else, so I'm happy we're here.
Life in general just seems less stressful in this situation than in our last.

When John went out to call the kids in last night, he got to introduce himself to the neighbors across the street. The Mr. is in IT too, so they had lots to talk about, and he was even invited in! I was bummed though, to hear that the Mrs. and the children are going back to India for the summer starting on Sunday. John is hoping to be able to hang out with the Mr. a lot more after his family leaves. He's never seen so many programmers in his life as he has since we've moved! (John was the ONLY programmer in the office where he worked before!) Now he works with 'em, AND lives next to 'em! He's a happy boy! :O)

Oh! I keep forgetting! We got our first package of shoes on Monday! Thanks Katie, I think that was from you! We also got a brass bell this week that says "Fishers" on it... but it didn't say who it was from. So, thank you, whoever you are! It is BEAUTIFUL!

21 Months Home

21 Months home! (A few days late!) This month has been busy and eventful with the move, but it has also been one of the best months with the kids yet. The big move has drawn us all together really beautifully somehow. All the long carrides up here to look for housing, all the excitement of making our new house a "home" and having John home with us so much of the time (though he's not anymore as of Wednesday).

It has been interesting to me to hear surprise from the neighbors/new friends that the kids are from Ukraine. One neighbor just yesterday told me she never would have known! (The kids have been playing with their kids ever since we moved in, so she's had lots of chances to hear them talk). I think they have a bit of an accent yet, but probably she wasn't paying too much attention... ? She also had asked why we homeschool, and that was why I mentioned the "Ukraine thing" in the first place. She was really surprised and said they sooo good and well adjusted. *big grin from Mama*

Food is still big around here. I wish it wouldn't be horrible to pin signs on my kids asking people not to feed them! There is a self-proclaimed "Candy Man" at our new church, and we've had to ask him not to feed our kiddos. (We didn't really have the nerve to do so at our old church, but we figure we're starting over, and can do so here). Adam's attachment to us has probably been the most affected by people *everywhere* giving him treats that we don't normally give him. I don't just give candy and sugary snacks any and every time the kids are around me, and yet there are/were neighbors, folks at church, etc., that would give our kids these things just because the kids said "hello" to them. Sunday School teachers give snacks, candy, and gifts CONSTANTLY, and it makes John and I into caregivers that don't do as well of a job as these Most Wonderful People. Some would even write them notes in the mail, give gift cards, presents, etc. (Ask me how many times I've given my kids gift cards!) Anyway, that stuff has not helped our relationship along At All. It is SO hard to explain, but those of you out there with older adopted kiddos might know what I mean, and if so, I'd love for you to comment, so it can be better explained for the rest of the world reading. (Penney, Brenda, Cath, are you out there???) If anything has been "the hardest" about our older kids, this has been it.

The day before yesterday, I made apple juice for our morning juice instead of our "usual" oj/other fruit juice, and Adam told me that Grandma Fisher gave him/the rest of the kids some apple juice boxes on the way home from the airport in the car. That was 21 months ago the day they came home from Ukraine. And he still remembered the flavor of the juice. Food is definitely a very big deal. Our relationships aren't as shaky as in those first months home, but because food is still so huge to them, we do need to be careful... (And know what? Liana just asked me for about the 5th time if I've forgotten that she was hungry for her lunch, and wondered if we were going to have it today.) (And, btw, I've NEVER forgotten to fix the kids lunch in all the months we've been home. I myself have an affinity for a full tummy, and had to explain that to her just now.) I should add, though, that food is NOT an issue for Leks. Never really has been, except for the texture-thing she had when she first came home that quickly wore off.

One day this spring, Adam was playing a video game and the girls were outside. Well, they came in and asked if our neighbor could give them a cookie (or whatever it was.) I said it would be ok, and instantly, Adam dropped the video game to go with his sisters to the neighbor's house for "his cookie." (HELLO! We have cookies here!) I should have stopped everyone dead in their tracks and fed them one of our kinds of cookies, but I think I actually let them all go. *sigh* Occassionally, when Adam is feeling sorry for himself, he'll ask me to make him cookies "right now." And if I say no, he'll go sulk. (If I let him, he would anyway... I don't allow complaining unless I don't notice it right away.) The funny thing is, that he usually waits until I'm up to my elbows in something else. Like during our move, come to think of it. Half of our kitchen was packed in boxes and we were using papter plates, etc. He asked me to make him cookies. What. Ever.

Ok, off the food talk. The rest of life around here is wonderful, and the food issue is actually sooooo hard to "see" that most of the wide world looking in on our family would see absolutely nothing out of the ordinary. No squirt-guns with red ink, no soap being used up in one day, the tp is lasting as long as it should, nobody scaring Mama to death with their crazy behavior. If it never gets better than it is right now, I'd have to say that I'd still be the luckiest mama in the world!

Shoe Drive Heads-Up

Many of you have asked about the Shoe Drive this year. We are definitely going to be sending another shipment to the kids' orphanage this year, and if you would like to add to it, you are more than welcome! We were all overwhelmed last year by the generosity of so many of you. I loved the lesson for my kiddos as well as the opportunity to help out. Several families had their kids go through their own closets and sent us their own shoes... and I think that is AWESOME. (You deserve "Great Mommy" awards for encouraging your kiddos to do that!) I'm definitely not opposed to sending used shoes, so if any of you are frequent yard-salers, we'll take whatever you find, but please don't make me scrub them up! lol! (But unless the undies are Pristine, I don't really want to pass along used panties... I did find some reallllllly nice heavy-weight high-quality undies for toddlers in a 2T last summer that I found at a yard sale, and didn't think twice about sending them.) Keep in mind that these undies are going to be Really Worn.

So! I thought I'd give a heads up about it again, and give a little more specifics on what the deal is... We'll be sending the package on August 17th, which is our "Home from Ukraine" anniversary. We're sending socks, undies and shoes. Please keep in mind that the orphanage we're sending this stuff to is for little kids from about 3-8. There are a few children on either end of that age spectrum, but most of the kids are this age. BUT. These kiddos are not the size of American kiddos this age. Our Liana was 6 when we brought her home, and she was just a little size 4 in her undies. Leksa was a size 3. Adam was about a size 7 or 8. So, I'm thinking for undies, I'd love to see a bunch of sizes between 2T-7. There will be more of a need for the smaller sizes because of accidents that littler kiddos inevitably have, especially when they have giardia. If you do happen to send larger sizes, that's fine, but, there aren't many children who are actually bigger than that.

Shoes are tricky too. I'd say sizes 6-13 would be good "target" sizes, but again, I'll send whatever you pass along! They will all undoubtedly be put to good use.

Some people also sent socks. During the winter time, the kids all wear tights. That's boys too. Adam wore tights even as a 9yo. They just all wear 'em. So, if you find warm tights anywhere at a garage sale this summer (can't really buy 'em in the stores right now), they'd also be well-appreciated.

Our new address is:

885 Fraser Lane Apt. B
Hudson, WI 54016

Thank you!!!

Happy Mother's Day to Me!

Happy Mother's Day! It was a freezing day, so nobody would cooperate with smiles, so we opted for Plan B photo ops... I kinda like 'em, though, our yard/view make for great back drops for anything!

This morning the kids presented me with their gifts... Liana got me a yellow rose, Adam got me a keychain, and Aleksa got me a duck statue.
Papa came through with some red roses... (What a lucky Mama I am!) It was fun getting ready for church this morning... The kids were all scrambling to get their last minute pictures drawn for me and kept shouting in, "Don't come out yet, Mama!" Such sweetie pies I have! After church we tried to go out for dinner, but everywhere was packed, so I suggested Dairy Queen. It was fun, and the kids couldn't have been happier with thier icecream treats! (And Papa and I didn't mind them either!) lol!

Adoption Agency in the Library!

We all scoped out our new library today. It was *ok* but, well, it sure made the old one look like the Library of Congress compared to this one. *sigh*

But! I did notice that in the same building as the library, there is an adoption agency... My eyes didn't get big as saucers or anything... (YEAH RIGHT), but my fingers did need to do a Google search once we got home. John says, "No-no, Shelly," and that there's no sense thinking about adoption stuff for another year at least. *snort* ;O) He's right, of course, but I did think it was interesting! Wouldn't you have thought it was interesting if you had been me? ;O)

I wouldn't use "this" agency anyway. I loved the one we used for our homestudy, and I'm sure they wouldn't mind if I put a little plug in for them here. If you're in Wisconsin, and need a FABULOUS agency to do your h.s., use Pauquette Childrens' Services in Portage. Ask for Kari. They do updates for free if you happen to go over a year, and they are very, very obliging. I think they do adoptions to U.S., China, Ecuador, Peru, India... but, if you want to adopt using another agency or independently, they're very flexible and reasonable! (They even updated our h.s. to three kids for us on the spur of the moment before our trip... for FREE! Aren't they AWESOME?)

Our homestudy agency wrote me recently to find out if we had taken care of our post-adoption obligations with Ukraine. Many of you know that Ukraine has halted US adoptions except under special circumstances. US families are not fulfilling their promises to send yearly reports to the Ukrainian Consulate in their area. There are evidently hundreds of US families who don't think they need to send them in! These forms/reports take about 30 minutes to fill out, TOTAL, and yet, they don't send them in, and the entire host of Ukrainian orphans are left without any of us being able to come get them. It seriously Makes Me Sick. Our next reports are due in August, (you have to send them yearly for the first three years home), and I plan to send copies of last year's reports along as well to MAKE SURE they have them.

Anyway, I'm thrilled that our h.s. agency wanted to make sure we followed through. That might also mean that other agencies are inquiring of THEIR families if they've also followed through. It isn't even like they/we have to have a full-fledged post-placement report from a social worker. It's just a simple form! GET THOSE REPORTS IN! All you need to do is download the form from the Ukrainian Consulate's website. At least they are on the Chicago branch's website. FILL THEM OUT AND SEND THEM IN. (Did I yell that loud enough?) Also, it would be wise to insure the delivery so you have proof in your hands that the reports were received. Ukraine's post-adoption reports are probably the EASIEST of any country's requirements. Let's give the rest of those children left in UA a chance at having a good future...

Boy, did that turn into a soapbox talk. Sorry. Well, Kinda sorry. ;O)

Settling in emotionally

I've written about our "physical" move, but not a whole lot on the emotional. The drive up here was pretty stressful for Liana. She was on High Alert most of the way here. If I sounded like I was remotely unsafe, or lost (we were following John), she would try to fix it herself by telling me where to go, etc. We needed to have a talk about how it's the Mama's and Papa's job to take care of their kiddos, and that 7yos' jobs are to just be 7yos.

The first night home, though, Liana woke up crying her eyes out missing everyone and everything. She missed her grandparents, she said, and her friends. She wrote her best friend Rachel a letter yesterday.

But, really, though, she and Aleksa are doing fabulously. Adam is doing as well as we expected him to, but we *knew* that as soon as we started school again, he was going to be pulling those control strings again.

And, we were right. We started school as soon as we found the books - (which was Tuesday), and boy was I glad to have John home this week. As the days have gone by, though, he's gotten much better. Today's only "incident" was him telling us he didn't know how to say "Where am I going?" He would say, "Where is I going?," "Where are I going?," "Where I am going?" and alllllll kinds of variants. John and I have gotten good at standing firm emotionlessly. I often need to keep busy to quit "thinking about it" as it does get annoying after a while, but that has just helped me get my boxes unpacked faster! ;O) It didn't last as long as "usual" for this week, however, so I'm kinda wishing that tomorrow were Friday instead of Saturday, so we could have another day of "normal routine" instead of throwing another oddball day in the mix. I'm just hoping that we don't start all over next week.

I'm climbing out of the box jungle, but it's taking a while. A lot of it, I'm keeping in boxes since we're only here a year (although all of this unpacking and readjustment stuff is making me think TWO years here wouldn't be the end of the world!)

Nothing at all to report about Aleksa. She's just Leksa. Coloring, reading, writing, pretending Aleksa. She was just pretending that "Miss Peterson" was late for something or other, and she needed to go find her. Not sure if I've mentioned her skirt affinity, but Aleksa more often than not prefers to run around in a skirt. (Don't know where that came from, because I'm NOT that way at all!) So, she'll throw on a skirt, high heels, long necklaces, then pretend she's a lady and goes around talking like one. "At 5:30, Miss Peterson needed to be here, but I just can't seem to find her!" She says it nobody in particular, but as she passes through the room, we hear stuff like this allll the time. (I just plain can't type what her little authoritative voice sounds like, but it cracks me up.)

Well, anyhow, that's the deal around here. A few minor bumps in the road, but nothing terribly alarming.

Ya know, I was *JUST* about to hit "save" when Adam just came up to me with a colorbook page that he wrote, "Adam loves Mama." Then he gave me a hug and said, "Mama, I so happy you adopt me from that yucky orphanage. I would be stuck there forever." And then he fluttered away...

I guess in other words, we're all doing GREAT!

We Moved!

I think every muscle in my body is sore. These last few weeks have been grueling. We got all moved out on Saturday, and a bunch of folks from our church showed up to help us pack the truck and clean the house. They also brought us lunch, which was sooooo nice! The neighbors came over to say goodbye too. The kids had evidently really wormed their way into their hearts, because some of them came over with a camera to take pics of us all, plus they gave us a giant fruit/goodie basket as well as about a bajillion odds and ends including framed pictures, blankets, rugs, rubbermaid items, etc. Nice, but, um, odd. I had no idea about all the "odds and ends" until we were UNpacking the truck in Hudson and I kept wondering where all this extra stuff came from. One lady who actually moved out of our neighborhood last winter heard through the grapevine that we were moving out, and she showed up on Saturday to wish us well and give us a small gift to remember her by. One set of neighbors even gave us a framed picture of themselves. *shrugs*

Anyway, I might have mentioned last week that we had a farmhouse lined up to rent. (It's been a fog around here, so if this is old news, just please oblige me the redundancy this once). Well, anyway, we had a cute little farmhouse on 40 acres of woods all lined up to rent, and someone beat us with the security deposit by 20 minutes. That was last Friday. So, Saturday we drove up to the area again looking for somewhere to rent. Struck out again. Came home, and started scrambling to find *anything* we could.

I called a sister church in Hudson to ask the pastor if maybe he's heard of anything for rent, and while he was on the way out of town, he handed that request over to one of the deacons, who called us and offered to help us out a bit. Nice! So, we did find someplace to look at on Monday night, filled the application out on Tuesday, and signed the lease on Saturday *just* before we moved in.

We're in a "twin home" (can you say "duplex?") ;O) It's absolutely heaven compared to where we were. We are out in the country, just on the edge of town. We drive past horses on our way out of our housing development. We have a beautiful view of the countryside from the livingroom, and best of all, all the storage space a gal could ask for! Two car garage, plus enormous closets which instantly made the childrens' rooms immaculate, and I'm *loving* that! We also have no highspeed internet connection. Isn't that a hoot that we move up to the Cities, and lost our internet!? Such irony in that! We called a Satellite Guy today, however, and now we're both much happier after going all weekend without hopping online at all.

I didn't mention us moving in! John's parents and brother drove up with us, and helped us unload, and also the guy from the church in town here rounded up a crew of folks to help us too! What an enormous BLESSING! They also brought supper enough for a few nights, one of them invited us over for dinner on Sunday, etc., etc. It was really, really nice. I was definitely impressed with their hospitality and love. (And one of these ladies brought over supper for us last night too, which was enough for Tuesday night as well. Haven't had to cook here yet!)

John's first day of work went well! He got to the office this morning, they told him they'd like him to start on some certifications which he has been wanting to do for some time anyway. And since there isn't a jobsite lined up for him quite yet, he can devote his time to doing those, get paid his salary, STAY HOME to do it online, and get a few bonuses when he finishes them. Sweet!

This morning we introduced ourselves to the neighbor who shares our duplex. They are from Liberia, West Africa! They have a 10yo girl and a 4yo girl. The 4yo is an absolute DOLLY. The neighbor across the street is from India! *sings "It's a Small World After All"* I'm loving, loving, LOVING the international flavor of the neighborhood. John and I have been trying hard to make the world "small" for the kids - to learn lots about other countries, to know their geography, etc., and so these neighbors just Thrill My Heart! (Speaking of which, I need to take a picture of the world map shower curtain that I got for the kids' bathroom. I hung up their Ukrainian alphabet poster in there too, and I think it is awesome!)

I found the kitchen and livingroom yesterday, and today I unpacked the kids' rooms and their books and school stuff. Still haven't dug my way out of the den or masterbedroom yet... tomorrow! John still has lots to do setting up his computer stuff. (I don't know a thing about that. I just know how to check email, google, and blog!) ;O)

Btw, John's parents are ok. Very bruised up, but fine. They were going down the highway and someone pulled out in front of them. They've totalled their car, and are going to be sore for a while, but I understand there are no broken bones. Life can change so drastically so quickly. Great reminder not to take anything(one) for granted, and to thank God for each day He gives us!

Well, anyhow, I'm exhausted. I've been wishing for bedtime since about 4:30, and now that it's about 9:00pm, I'm thinking I can get away with it now! Thanks for checking in!

Pics

This is one of my new all-time favorite pics of my kiddos. I love, love, love that Liana is wearing a shirt that is way too small for her, but she can't part with it because it has a Curtsy L on it. :O) Can't they all stay just exactly like this forever?



These are two of my colorers. I took this one from the door, and I didn't yet realize that Adam was on the step below them coloring too.



Talk about a mother's DREAM. I just LOVE that the kids are picking up books on their own and finding quiet corners of the house to enjoy them in... and it is especially cool to find them reading to each other! Such a relief to have the kids being so good lately after the rough stuff I mentioned before. Very much an answer to prayer!

Moving update

Well, since we're moving, maybe it's time for a change here too! (Actually, my blog was flaky last night and this morning and John had to put a new template up to make it work). The timing seems appropriate though, so I might keep it this way.

We're moving Saturday morning to Hudson, WI, which is only 2 1/2 hours north of here, but plenty far enough away to have to start over with new friends, church, shopping routines, etc. *sigh*

The kids are doing WONDERFULLY. In fact, they're soooo relaxed about everything, that I've been even taking pictures of them "being good." This morning I walked past Adam's room to see him and Liana sprawled out on their backs on Adam's bare mattress on the floor with Liana reading him a book contentedly. I did a double-take, and then I backtracked to grab the camera. ;O) This afternoon I found all three kiddos on the steps of the deck coloring quietly. (Where did these kids come from???) Had to grab the camera for that one too!

I, however, am drowning in boxes! We only *just* found our house on Monday (we're renting 'til we settle down, sell our house, get to know the Cities better, etc.), and we're planning to move Saturday! We'll be signing the lease the morning we move in. Talk about Under The Wire. Uff! Hope we never have to do that again! lol! It was a hairy few weeks, let me just say!

Anyway, that's the news here. I probably won't post again until after the weekend when we get the computer hooked up, etc.

Moving Stresses?

Moving is a stressful time for anyone, but I think the stress is getting to the kids most right now. There are boxes everywhere, we just got rid of the piano, our routine has been blown out the window with me scouting housing, trying to pack, do school with them, etc. Plus, they're starting to understand that they aren't going to see their friends and our family as often anymore. I've had more than my share of "first months home flashbacks" lately! lol!

Basically, I'm having a bit of trouble with the kiddos right now. Yesterday Aleksa got in more hot water than she'd been in in the last six weeks altogether it seems like. She was seeking control alllll day long. Control of her siblings, control of herself, control of her mama... Uff. It was a long day. (And she's usually the easiest!)

Liana has been doing the best, actually. She gave her best friend a necklace that she kept the match to (One said "Friends" and one said "Forever"), and she got to spend the whole afternoon at her house on Sunday as a last hurrah type of a thing. She has choked up a few times thinking of leaving her friends/family, but I think that's *exactly* what a normal little 7yo would be feeling. No acting-out; she's handling life beautifully actually.

And then there's Adam. He has been hitting every single control button he has ever found all lately, only going overtime doing so. Because of his speech difficulties, we often ask him to say something differently, or correctly. Well, this morning I asked him to say, "What did she say?" again. He came up with about 500 different ways to possibly mangle that question, refusing to even come close to how it is supposed to be. That's his way of having control. We can't force what comes out of his mouth, so that's his "weapon" of choice with us. This afternoon, he couldn't read the word "mixed." Well, he CAN read the word "mixed" but he refused to do so. He said "mixed-ed," "mix-Edd" and about a half dozen variants, all the while refusing to say the correct one. It's weird to me that he thinks it hurts me when he doesn't read/say something right. He expects me to blow up at him, I'm pretty sure. That's odd to say, but truly, if he finds that something *remotely* annoys one of us, he jumps on it.

He has a new one too. He uses this one on his sisters quite often, and now in the last month or so has started to use it on me and John. He'll declare that he hates something, or that it is bad, or that he doesn't want to do something that everyone else thinks is fun - just to be annoying. Our homeschool group went bowling a few weeks ago, which we were all looking forward to. On the way there, we had to stop at the bank quick, during which time, he pulled his sisters aside and told them he HATED bowling, and that he was going to beg me to not make him go, and that he would not bowl, etc. Well, the girls got all ruffled about it, and they started crying, etc. I called his bluff, however, and told him he was welcome to sit in the car and do schoolwork while the rest of us had fun.

Yesterday, while I was looking online at houses, he told me he HATED the one I liked and that it was gross, and that he didn't want to go there, etc. It's just his control mechanism, apparently. His way of hanging onto some thread of control over his life. Perhaps many 11yo's do this, but this "kind" of thing fits well into how he wields control over other things.

All that to say: If you are looking for older kids, are you ready for them to look for and FIND your hot-buttons? How in-control of yourself are you? (Because they will needle you hard and long to see if you'll break). The more you break, the more often they'll needle you. Adam is _SO_ good at it. I've flunked out many, many times with him, and while I don't fail as often as I used to, I have definitely been challenged. What you don't think is in your heart will come floating to the top, truly, with a child who is not fully attached to you. Are you ready for the challenge of living 24/7 with a child who is on a constant seek-and-destroy mission to wear you down and see what you're made of? Are you a rock? Or are you close enough to BECOME a rock in short order? Because you can NOT blow up at these kids. You just can't. (In fact, at this *very* minute, Adam is doing it again. He has never heard the word "minutes" he says, so he doesn't know how to say it. He sure gets an A+ for creativity in how many different ways it could be possibly said, however!)

It is a challenge to parent older kids. It is a joy, but there are challenges too. Their hurts are deep, and their fears often control them. Fear of letting someone into their life, fear of letting go what threads of power they might feel they have. Can you be stronger than our emotions and not give in when they challenge you? Can you absolutely NOT let your child rule the house like that "bad Papa at McDonalds?") If you can, you can succeed at tearing down those walls around their hearts. You will have victories, and great joys in your parenting. If you are the kind of person that lets your emotions control you, you're in for a very long haul, I'm afraid.

That said, I still wouldn't have done it any other way, and we will be looking for older kids if we ever adopt again...

Bad Papas

I have to tell you all about what happened at McDonalds the other day. We were all sitting in a booth directly across from (and almost uncomfortably close to) another one with a man and his maybe 4yo little girl. The little girl started whining horribly that she wanted more chicken nuggets, and the dad kept saying, "no." Well, she kept it up until finally the dad had enough... and he got up, said, "Ok, fine," and went and bought her what she wanted. !.

John and I shot some raised eyebrows at each other, but Liana broke our silence. She couldn't believe it either, evidently, because very bewildered-like, she said, "That papa is going to buy her chicken nuggets! She made her papa buy her chicken nuggets!" She was shocked, shocked, shocked. I asked her, "Liana, what did he just teach that little girl?" And she very wisely said, "To whine some more whenever she wants something."

"Yup."

I was sooooo proud of her!

20 Months Home!

Happy Easter, everyone!

Wow, so much has happened this last month! The biggest, most earth-shattering news is that John got a new job in Minneapolis, and we'll be moving up there as soon as possible. We're hoping to find a house in Hudson, WI, though, just across the river from the Cities. We'll see. John actually signs the contract tomorrow, (er, today, depending one when you're reading this!) He was off shootin' at some food the other day, and all of a sudden up through the ground came this job... ;O) That's almost what happened. They found him, not vice versa, so this was a sudden (and very welcomed!) surprise. We're going to hate moving away from family and friends, but well, the next chapter of the Fisher Adventure is about to start! John's first day of work is May 8th. (!). The kids are excited, but I don't think they fully understand what all of this means. Adam is ecstatic at the thought of getting a dog. Hopefully it will work out that we can buy a house instead of rent one, but I don't want to rush into anything. Wanna get what I want, if you know what I mean... But, well, probably what I want isn't quite going to happen right away anyway. (I may have mentioned my dream of a farmhouse with a few goats in the yard...) (I know, I'm weird. Guess I need to pack up and move to Ukraine!) ;O)

Anyway, that's been the major bulk of what's been going through my brain lately. It has eaten my life, as a matter of fact. (Anything ever done that to you?) Thankfully, I did the girls' Easter dresses before any of this started up, so they were set for Easter. The Boys got their matching shirts again, too. And, they wound up with enough candy to last them about three weeks. Check that. Three days tops, I'm betting. ;O) I was telling my sister that the sugar buzz was pretty serious over here today. Thankfully everyone made it (alive and whole) into their beds tonight! ;O)

At dinner this afternoon (we went to John's sister's house), the kids and their cousin were talking, and their little 3yo cousin called someone "Zina." Aleksa piped up and asked for confirmation that that's what he'd said, and then she told him, "That's what my name was in Ukraine at the orphanage when nobody got me." (Mama promptly burst into tears...) I think it hit me so hard because our Aleksa NEVER EVER EVER volunteers talk about the orphanage. She hasn't ever talked about what she remembers, or if asked, she'll say she doesn't remember anything. She doesn't talk about it. Her brother and sister talk about it all the time, and while she doesn't leave the room or appear upset, she simply doesn't contribute anything. So, her saying that really hit me. She's cognitively at the point where she's beginning to puzzle together what has happened to her, whereas before, she let it fly over her head. Anyway, I'm sure I'll choke up about that for a good long time thinking about that...

After I pulled myself together a bit, I said, "Well, Leks, somebody's got you now!" I think "orphanage" comments are really starting to hit me harder now that our heart strings are tied as tight as they are. It absolutely kills me that Leksa had to sit in an orphanage so long with "nobody getting her." And my Adam and Liana! Nobody got them either! And there are so many others in the world waiting for mamas and papas. Maybe this job change will mean the possibility of Future Fishers too... So many little ones suffering out there wondering why nobody's got them yet...

April Fool!

Last year would have been crazy of us to do so, but this year, John and I have decided to initiate the children on APRIL FOOL'S DAY! *tee-hee*

We stayed up waaaaaay too late with a skein of yarn and a buncha toilet paper. We made major webs in their rooms making walking through their rooms an obstacle course. First we Yarned the rooms, and then we tp'd everything. It was a work of art.

This morning the kids woke up not at alllll excited. ;O) They were squealing, and giggling, and asking Why we would do it, and pretty much having a blast in all their mess. We told them we didn't know what they were talkng about, and that they should be ashamed of themselves making such messes so early in the morning. *hmph* lol! Well, that got them on an instant mission to play April Fools tricks on US! They gathered as much yarn as they could get, and they are now trying to make their own webs in the kitchen, livingroom, our bedroom.... (What did we do?!!!) ;O)

Best wishes to the Westons!

Remember last year when I posted the Weston's website?


http://www.wadeandjuliaweston.com


They were the family that adopted the two teen siblings, and had to leave one girl, Katya behind because her paperwork was not in order. Well, They're on their way to get her! They have an appointment at the NAC on March 30, and they need all the prayers they can get. The NAC is going to shut down for the whole month of April according to many rumors. But, the Westons are going anyway, and hoping for the best. Please, please, pray for this family, and their Katya, who they have waited so very long for. Buckle your seatbelts folks. This trip will be tougher than the last, I'm betting.

Re: Helen Keller

I have to blog this real quick...

I was just telling John about a gal who dropped me an email today and said that she'd read my entry about the Helen Keller movie, and also said that she'd seen that movie a few years ago, and wanted to know, "is adopting really like that?" because she didn't think she could handle it if it really was.

John grinned, nodded up and down, and said, "Yes, it IS like that movie ~ for about two months. But then you get used to it, and it's ok." LOL! I busted up laughing over that one. No wonder I have a permanant twitch in my right eye!

We are just kidding, btw. It does get better.

(Usually!) ;O)

Helen Keller Movie

We watched a video the other night... it was "The Miracle Worker" with Hallie Kate Eisenberg as Helen Keller. If you haven't seen it, and are planning to adopt, RUN OUT AND GET IT. As I watched it, my heart actually started racing as I had flashbacks of when the kids first came home. Almost a panic-type of a heart-racing. I looked over at John and without me asking him, he said something like, "Yes, it reminds me of that too." The movie really illustrates what an unattached child "looks" like - especially the first days/weeks home. If I have any advice for y'all, it would be to watch this movie with your spouse, and then afterwards, talk out (at GREAT LENGTH) what YOU would do to parent such a child if he/she were in your home. How would you deal with it if your child did some of the things Helen did in the show? What lengths would you go to to make the child "well?" Helen's teacher went to great - even ENORMOUS lengths to help her. What are you willing to do?

The story has a happy ending. It was so touching, and hit home soooo hard, that John had tears dripping off his chin. I was choked up too. Our kids weren't *quite* as horrible as Helen, but when you multiply what each of our kids had times three... well, we were having Flashbacks Like Crazy at the many times we felt as overwhelmed with the strong wills of our kiddos.

Go rent it. I'm tellin' ya, you'll have a clue what those first weeks home will be like, and by making your game plan now, you'll save yourselves some Excederin. Ok, you might need some anyhow. ;O)

19 Months Home

I'm a few days late posting this. The 17th was our 19 months home mark. I've been a bit overwhelmed lately with a very full plate. It's actually really starting to get to me, but I think things are about to calm down a bit (fingers crossed!), so hopefully I'll feel more like a person soon! I took a three hour nap on Saturday to recover from last week, and I've felt lots better ever since.

A lot has happened this month!

Adam first. Seems like we're constantly pulling a "one step forward, two steps back" with him. He'll be cruising along, and then crash into the side of the road and we have to go back a little way and regroup to start again. John and I have noticed some food issues that seemed to have been quiet for a while start revving up again. We've been noticing that *every* time Adam sees that there is extra food to be had during mealtimes, he'll ask for it. Doesn't matter what it is. Could be a spoonful of peas at the bottom of a serving bowl. Could be another slice of ham. Whatever. If he sees it, he'll ask for it. He doesn't hoard or steal food though, and hasn't since he first came home. Some wounds take longer to heal than others, however. :O(

Other than the food thing, Adam has been doing pretty well! He still likes to test me to see if I'm really a) in authority over him and b) if I really love him or not. (Psssst, Adam! a) yes, I am! and b) yes, I do!)

The language thing is still his biggest issue, but he's really been doing GREAT this month! Unfortunately, the only people that really know that are me and John, because once he gets an audience, he's all show, and for some reason, shuts off the brain and starts getting silly, and he can't concentrate enough to really speak clearly and correctly. He has been speaking full paragraphs *beautifully* save for one or two words or grammar structure errors. I have more confidence in that than ever that the future is pretty bright for him regarding his speech. Couldn't always say that truthfully.

Other than that stuff, he's enjoying doing Boy Stuff. He has his tent set up in his room and has been sleeping in it quite often lately. He's got it made, really. Between his loft bed, and his tent, he's been having a ball!

Next, Liana. She's still so strong willed! I've been babysitting a bunch for John's sister's kids lately, and Liana is little-miss-mama. Until a few days ago, when the baby would come over, she was constantly reminding ME to do this, that or the other thing concerning the baby. (We had to have a chit-chat over that one). She can diaper the baby, feed the baby, rock the baby, put the baby to sleep, carry the baby around, etc. (The baby is a year old, btw). But, baby Callie has come to really love Liana too. She was following Liana around all day Friday asking Liana to pick her up.

Otherwise though, while she struggles Daily with her strong will, she does seem to be wanting to be doing what's right, and these months of constantly redirecting that "power" really do seem to be paying off. She has truly come a long way already. It's just that she's got a long way to go yet too! ;O) She's gonna be a dynamite whatever it is, that's for sure!

Liana has taken off to outerspace with her reading, and I suspect it will keep getting better and better from here on out. She has just this month discovered how much FUN reading is! YAY! Just a few nights ago, she picked up a book and read it to Aleksa on the couch, just for fun. (Trust me, this wouldn't have happened last month... either her reading would have been too choppy to keep Leksa's attention, or Liana wouldn't have wanted to do it in the first place!) It was realllllly heartwarming for this mama! :O) Adam stood over their shoulder and helped Liana out whenever she stumbled over a word (which wasn't very often), but mostly, he listened in. John and I think the whole trouble with Liana's "taking off" had to do with her will. She is a proud little girl (uff!) If she can't do something well, she doesn't want to do it, and she'll get instantly MAD at YOU if she can't do it right. That meant a rocky start at reading, since she couldn't do it right at first! But now that she KNOWS she can do it... look out world! :O)

Speaking of looking out world! Here comes Aleksa Lu! She's just blowing me away with how fast she's picking up reading. Today she read a really long story (for her - it was probably 8 lines long). She's been chomping at the bit to read "the big one" and today was the day! The other two, when they had to read this particular story a year ago, pitched Major Fits at the THOUGHT of having to read it. It's all in the attitude, I'm almost certain. Aleksa does a little cheer for herself at the end of every correct word or sentence. The other two never did. Aleksa thinks it is fun to TRY to read it, even if she's wrong and stumbles. The other two panicked. (Don't get me wrong - they did "ok" - but well, now that I have Aleksa to compare them to, I can see that they did have a harder time).

Aleksa is also little miss geographer! Our world map is on our kitchen table under the plastic table cloth (remember me mentioning that?) Well, I quiz the older two on where places are on the map every lunchtime. Well, Miss Smartie has learned these places right along with the other two. She can tell you where Ukraine, Russia, USA, China, Mongolia, India, Italy, Egypt, Greece, Kenya, the Nile River, and a few other places are! Pretty good for a 5 year old! (And pretty good for a 7 and an 11yo too, because they all know 'em!)

All three kids got baptized last Sunday! I got pretty wet myself! We "dunk" at our church as opposed to sprinkle or pour, so, as I helped them out of the baptistry, I got pretty soaked. (John sat with the congregation and video taped it). Of course, it didn't help that as I took one out, that instead of sending him/her to the changing room, I made them stay there to watch the next one get baptized too. My shoes were pretty wet with everyone's drippage. I couldn't miss it though! I wasn't about to miss 2 of my kids getting baptized because I was towelling off one! What kind of mom would have done that!? Everyone came out of the changing rooms dry except for me, because I was the only one who didn't bring a change of clothes! Anyway, it was really neat, and it sure hit home to us how far the kids have come in just a year and 7 months! Pastor said some really nice things afterwards, and it really choked me up a bit. I was glad to be hiding in the dressing room instead of sitting in the pew where I would have been all choked up in public.

I think this month, over all the recent months, has given us a clearer picture of how "life is going to be" for us. Adam's speech is indeed improving. Liana's strong will is indeed being redirected. Aleksa is indeed learning up a storm and understanding more than we give her credit for. We're getting there. But more importantly, we're enjoying the trip along the way!

Good Night Jim Bob!

Can't go to bed quite yet. My mind is full of kid-thoughts. Not really sure what I'm going to write, but I guess I just gotta post something!

Today was one of those "day in the life" kind of days. Nothing at all extraordinary happened today. In fact, if I sit back and look at the things we did today, I'd say it was rather a boring day. Know what? Strike that. It was perfect.

Aside from our Saturday trip to the library, we pretty much just stayed home and enjoyed being "us." Well, except for John (poor guy!) He's been swamped with work and extra projects lately, so he was stuck sitting at the computer all day long trying to cross things off that to-do list. He even skipped out of the library run. *gasp!* So, I guess the day wasn't completely perfect since he couldn't fully participate. :O(

Anyway, as for the rest of us, we basically just lounged around. We all seemed to gravitate toward wherever the rest of us were, so we all found ourselves in our room (where John was working), and the kids and I tickled, and snuggled, and chatted, and wrestled. Other than Liana finding one of my very few tickle spots, it was a stress-free kind of a day. It was the kind of day where I go to bed completely Knowing that I am blessed, blessed, blessed and absolutely thrilled to be a mom.

I grew up an only child. Sure, I have six siblings, but they were up and out of the house by the time I could really remember much. Whenever they came home, I loved the fact that the house made noise. I knew I'd have lots of kids when I grew up. It really was Devastation when I realized I couldn't physically have any. After a day like today I think, "OK, I've got three, this is easy, let's go get some more!" (I really need to check out some Waltons dvd's from the library... maybe that will inspire John to want to go get some more kiddos somewhere!) JUST KIDDING! Kinda. ;O) Anyway, though we only do have three kids, it definitely was a "Good night John Boy" kind of a day. Thank you, God, for my family!

Lesson Learned

Memo to Self:

Next time you get a months' worth of groceries and then decide to let the kids bring in the food as you stay outside and hand bags to them out of the trunk, think again....